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Johnson & Johnson Launches New Lethal Strength Tylenol |
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 Written by Mike Richardson Bryan
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Tuesday, 12 August 2008 |
NEW BRUNSWICK, NJ—Johnson & Johnson unveiled its latest Tylenol-brand product yesterday, billing it as the industry's strongest over-the-counter pain remedy yet.
"Americans have been clamoring for more and better pain relief, and that relief is finally here," said company spokesman Jim Lisle. "Each tablet of new Lethal Strength Tylenol contains enough acetaminophen to liquefy the average human brain in under a minute. Pain doesn't stand a chance against its awesome, fast-acting power."
This is not Johnson & Johnson's first experiment with such radical pain relief. The company test marketed a similarly lethal pain remedy in the Chicago area in 1982, but the product was badly received and had to be pulled from store shelves after only one week. But Lisle is confident that this time will be different, insisting, "After seven years of George W. Bush and two years of Hannah Montana, Americans no longer fear death at all."
The new product will be marketed under the slogan, "When you're dying for relief—and by God, we mean dying—reach for Tylenol."
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